he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
The adults are the big ones right?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
