So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
