i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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