Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
