well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
