butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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