Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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