you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
