Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
i black out too much to be "responsible"
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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