Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
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