it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
