i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
