so explain again why im purple
no
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
