The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Dear god my vagina.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
