I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
