I looked at my own cervix.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Randomize
