he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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