well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize