I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
