You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
