sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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