Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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