I can tuck mytits in my pants
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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