During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
