Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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