underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
