Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
