She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
