I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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