Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
