i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
