well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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