Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
