My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
How external is "for external use only"?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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