i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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