Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She swung at the pinata with crutches
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
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