tell your sister to shave her snatch
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
