im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
