Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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