I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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