I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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