Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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