Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I got inside last night via doggy door
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
