There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
