I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
