Well apparently he's into motor boating.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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