Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
