yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
