no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
