if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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